On My Life and Moving Back to Alaska…

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A friend of mine said that Fairbanks is a good place to figure out your life. I think she is right about that.

The other night I sat out on the deck drinking coffee and peering through the birch and spruce trees at the valley beyond. The rain was coming down lightly, making a soft pattering sound on the leaves and the muddy earth. Despite the gray skies it was still light. Almost anywhere else in the U.S. one might think it was perhaps four or five in the afternoon, but here it was almost ten o’clock at night, and it wouldn’t be getting much darker either.

I feel pretty fortunate to have this unique opportunity to house sit my friends log home in the hills outside Fairbanks. It’s quiet out here, and peaceful—the perfect situation to work on my novel. Even when I get a job, I will have plenty of time to write. If I don’t finish at least the first draft of my novel this summer, it is my own fault. But even more, it is the perfect environment, really, to listen for and hear God.

When I moved up here I decided to move here with intentionality. It wasn’t until my first night house sitting that I realized what that intentionality was—to hear God and to figure out what he wants from me, or rather, what he wants me to do with my life. A part of me wants to know right now. After all, I’m almost thirty. I’m running out of time. Yet I cannot ignore the wisdom of Alexander Pope when he said, “Some people don’t learn anything… because they understand everything too soon.” I have to be patient.

You know, come to think of it, didn’t Jesus spend forty days alone in the wilderness just prior to beginning his ministry? I’m not necessarily “alone in the wilderness” like he was, but for all practical purposes, it’s close enough.

I feel a little pathetic though, being almost 30 and not really knowing what I want to do with my life. I have a dream job, certainly, but I’m a long way from that ever happening. As I sat there on the porch thinking about it, though, I realized many people never really began their careers, their ministries, until about this time. Jesus was probably around 30 when he began his ministry. The apostle Paul met God no the Damascus road around the same time in his life. Billy Graham’s evangelistic ministry began when he was 30. Bill Bright was 31 when he started Campus Crusade… and my dad didn’t start working for the company he is at until he was 29. So maybe there’s something to be said about this time in my life.

In any case, this summer appears to be one of quietness and relative solitude. I’m house sitting for two months and I wonder it will be enough time—time to learn how to be still and listen; time to hear the voice of God in my life. I guess I will have to trust that it will be.

I’m happy to be back in Alaska…. back in Fairbanks.

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